Thoughts on Makeup
After you've exhausted all your options of things to do on snow days, you have to start getting creative. So, last night I decided to spend an hour and a half in the bathroom trying to actually do my makeup. I do not wear makeup for a few different reasons, the first and biggest reason being that I am lazy. But I wanted to see if I could actually do a semi-decent job of it, just for fun, so that's what I did. Obviously, I was also really bored and couldn't think of anything else to do at 7:30 on a Tuesday night. While I was doing my makeup, I had more than a few observations about makeup in general, which I will now share with you;
1. Makeup is hard
Dude. Unless you are ambidextrous and a professional artist, I don't know how the heck you get makeup to look good. I literally tried so hard and it still ended up looking pretty subpar. I mean, it was good for ME because I absolutely do not have any skills whatsoever. But it still looked very amateur and it was sooo difficult.
2. Makeup is time consuming
I was in my bathroom for a good 90 minutes and here's the finished product:
Like, that does NOT look like it would have taken me almost two hours. And to the untrained eye it probably looks like I'm not even wearing very much makeup at all. But believe me, I am, jeez Louise.
3. Makeup requires a lot of google searches
Okay so I put on foundation and than I was like "there's this mythical thing called contouring, I wonder how you do it" so I googled that (found out I had done my foundation all wrong, but oh well). Then I was like "oh I want to do a smokey eye" (mostly because that's basically the only thing I've ever heard of) so I googled that. Then I was like "What color should i do my lips now to go with the smokey eye?" which elicited yet another google search.
Here's the smokey eye tutorial I used versus how my eyes ended up looking LOLLL:
4. Makeup requires a lot of makeup
So on my face, which honestly looks like not that much, I'm wearing foundation, blush (because I don't own highlighter/bronzer), eyeliner, two different types of mascara, two different shades of eye shadow, and two different lipsticks. Also, besides requiring a lot of makeup, it requires a lot of GOOD makeup. Literally all the makeup I own I have owned forever. The newest product I have is mascara that my friend gave to me last year. So that being said, all my eye shadows are like dumb colors and my black eye shadow is not even black, it's like grey.
5. Part of knowing how to do makeup well is knowing how to take care of your products.
Hahahahahahahaha, I am so sorry to those of you who know how to do makeup and take care of your brushes and stuff, because I am literally your worst nightmare. I don't think I've ever washed my eye shadow brushes, and when they get too dirty I just throw them out. My eyelash curler looks like some maniacal spider catcher because it has like twenty decapitated eyelashes stuck to it. My big blush brush used to be black but now it's like grey with all the powder that's stuck in it, and my foundation pad thingies are barely even usable anymore they're caked with old foundation. I realize now how disgusting all those things are.
6. Makeup makes you feel good
After my makeup was finished, I looked in the mirror and was like "dude, I actually look good!" You couldn't see my acne, my eyes looked all big and purty and my lips which are usually just whatever actually looked pretty cool. I took an obscene amount of selfies for someone who like never posts selfies. And even now I'm probably going to just upload them to my computer to save for a rainy day when I want to remember that one time I actually looked halfway decent with makeup on.
7. Makeup makes you feel bad
At the same time, I was really self conscious about it. I didn't really look like "me", in the usual sense. Even though I didn't have anywhere to go, I knew for a fact that I could never go out in public looking like that. Because even though I knew I looked good, I felt like I was faking it in a way. Like everyone would look at me and be like "Ew, why is she wearing makeup?" I guess because I never wear makeup, now I feel like I never really can without being questioned for it. And in a way that's okay with me because it means that people don't expect anything of me.
8. The filters on your phone make makeup look totally different
This is honestly insane:
9. People have lots of opinions about makeup
I of course felt the need to snapchat my friends after I had put on my makeup, and GC and KK were all like "You look hot!" and MR was like "Too much lipstick" (lol boys). My mom had the same response she has to just about everything I do in life, which was "You are a very strange child".
10. Makeup is hard to get off
Besides the fact that my makeup removing cloths are completely dried up (I told you I suck at this) after vigorously scrubbing for like twenty minutes, I finally managed to remove basically my whole face.
11. Even after you've taken off makeup, it still lingers
When I woke up this morning, I looked in the mirror and there are still wanton traces of eyeliner! Agh!
12. Just because you "get" color schemes doesn't mean you "get" makeup
Okay, Imma be real: I can put together an outfit pretty well, I know what colors look good together, and how to manipulate color schemes to make cool ensembles. But when it comes to my face?? Wow. What the heck am I even doing. I know that certain colors go with brown eyes, and that my skin tone requires certain shades of highlighter and bronzer and whatnot, but I couldn't for the life of me tell you what any of those shades and colors ARE.
13. Makeup is not for everyone
Dude, if you don't feel like doing your makeup, don't do it. Don't start a cycle that you're going to eventually get tired of and then be regretful about. But if you DO feel like doing it, I envy you greatly and think you're very talented and have a LOT of patience.
14. Is putting on makeup supposed to hurt/be uncomfortable?
Okay, it's probably just because I'm really BAD at makeup, but literally every time I do it, my eyes water so bad, I get flecks of stuff in my eyes, I poke myself in the eye, and my wrist cramps up. Is this normal???
15. Makeup is not good or bad
There are plenty of things in life that are like this: they're not good or bad. You have to make the decision for yourself about what might be a bad thing for you. For some people, makeup might become a crutch or an idol. And so for them, it's bad. For others, makeup can be a confidence booster or just a fun hobby, and for them, it's good. For me, I don't really know. I don't think it's either. I think it's just a non-necessity. And I think that's how I'll keep it.1. Makeup is hard
Dude. Unless you are ambidextrous and a professional artist, I don't know how the heck you get makeup to look good. I literally tried so hard and it still ended up looking pretty subpar. I mean, it was good for ME because I absolutely do not have any skills whatsoever. But it still looked very amateur and it was sooo difficult.
2. Makeup is time consuming
I was in my bathroom for a good 90 minutes and here's the finished product:
Like, that does NOT look like it would have taken me almost two hours. And to the untrained eye it probably looks like I'm not even wearing very much makeup at all. But believe me, I am, jeez Louise.
3. Makeup requires a lot of google searches
Okay so I put on foundation and than I was like "there's this mythical thing called contouring, I wonder how you do it" so I googled that (found out I had done my foundation all wrong, but oh well). Then I was like "oh I want to do a smokey eye" (mostly because that's basically the only thing I've ever heard of) so I googled that. Then I was like "What color should i do my lips now to go with the smokey eye?" which elicited yet another google search.
Here's the smokey eye tutorial I used versus how my eyes ended up looking LOLLL:
4. Makeup requires a lot of makeup
So on my face, which honestly looks like not that much, I'm wearing foundation, blush (because I don't own highlighter/bronzer), eyeliner, two different types of mascara, two different shades of eye shadow, and two different lipsticks. Also, besides requiring a lot of makeup, it requires a lot of GOOD makeup. Literally all the makeup I own I have owned forever. The newest product I have is mascara that my friend gave to me last year. So that being said, all my eye shadows are like dumb colors and my black eye shadow is not even black, it's like grey.
5. Part of knowing how to do makeup well is knowing how to take care of your products.
Hahahahahahahaha, I am so sorry to those of you who know how to do makeup and take care of your brushes and stuff, because I am literally your worst nightmare. I don't think I've ever washed my eye shadow brushes, and when they get too dirty I just throw them out. My eyelash curler looks like some maniacal spider catcher because it has like twenty decapitated eyelashes stuck to it. My big blush brush used to be black but now it's like grey with all the powder that's stuck in it, and my foundation pad thingies are barely even usable anymore they're caked with old foundation. I realize now how disgusting all those things are.
6. Makeup makes you feel good
After my makeup was finished, I looked in the mirror and was like "dude, I actually look good!" You couldn't see my acne, my eyes looked all big and purty and my lips which are usually just whatever actually looked pretty cool. I took an obscene amount of selfies for someone who like never posts selfies. And even now I'm probably going to just upload them to my computer to save for a rainy day when I want to remember that one time I actually looked halfway decent with makeup on.
7. Makeup makes you feel bad
At the same time, I was really self conscious about it. I didn't really look like "me", in the usual sense. Even though I didn't have anywhere to go, I knew for a fact that I could never go out in public looking like that. Because even though I knew I looked good, I felt like I was faking it in a way. Like everyone would look at me and be like "Ew, why is she wearing makeup?" I guess because I never wear makeup, now I feel like I never really can without being questioned for it. And in a way that's okay with me because it means that people don't expect anything of me.
8. The filters on your phone make makeup look totally different
This is honestly insane:
 |
| With this filter, I look like I'm wearing a peachy red lipstick when in reality, it was like a purply burgundy color. I also have a nice peachy skin tone when in reality my foundation was like not even the right color for me at all and I looked pretty pale. Also my eyeliner looks on fleek. |
 |
| Obviously since this is black and white it looks quite different, but the most noticeable difference is that the contouring looks super natural, and you can't see where I covered up pimples like, at all! |
 |
| In this one, my eyebrow looks totally perfect, but my eyeliner looks pretty messy. |
9. People have lots of opinions about makeup
I of course felt the need to snapchat my friends after I had put on my makeup, and GC and KK were all like "You look hot!" and MR was like "Too much lipstick" (lol boys). My mom had the same response she has to just about everything I do in life, which was "You are a very strange child".
10. Makeup is hard to get off
Besides the fact that my makeup removing cloths are completely dried up (I told you I suck at this) after vigorously scrubbing for like twenty minutes, I finally managed to remove basically my whole face.
11. Even after you've taken off makeup, it still lingers
When I woke up this morning, I looked in the mirror and there are still wanton traces of eyeliner! Agh!
12. Just because you "get" color schemes doesn't mean you "get" makeup
Okay, Imma be real: I can put together an outfit pretty well, I know what colors look good together, and how to manipulate color schemes to make cool ensembles. But when it comes to my face?? Wow. What the heck am I even doing. I know that certain colors go with brown eyes, and that my skin tone requires certain shades of highlighter and bronzer and whatnot, but I couldn't for the life of me tell you what any of those shades and colors ARE.
13. Makeup is not for everyone
Dude, if you don't feel like doing your makeup, don't do it. Don't start a cycle that you're going to eventually get tired of and then be regretful about. But if you DO feel like doing it, I envy you greatly and think you're very talented and have a LOT of patience.
14. Is putting on makeup supposed to hurt/be uncomfortable?
Okay, it's probably just because I'm really BAD at makeup, but literally every time I do it, my eyes water so bad, I get flecks of stuff in my eyes, I poke myself in the eye, and my wrist cramps up. Is this normal???
15. Makeup is not good or bad
-VaughnDL
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