Emotional Exercise

     I've been exercising my emotions this weekend, and it's been awesome and awful at the same time, and totally exhausting. As you know, KK's grandmother passed away on Monday. I took off school on Friday to attend her funeral, because I knew it would mean a lot to KK to have someone there just for her. I told myself I wasn't going to cry, because I always feel kind of bad when I cry at the funerals of people I'm not related to, because it feels like I'm taking the attention away from the family, who are the ones who should actually be crying. But by the halfway point of the funeral, there were tears running down my face and into my scarf. It was waaaay too hot to be wearing a scarf, but I was actually grateful for it because I hadn't brought tissues, so I kept wiping my wet face with my scarf. Anyway, it was really emotional. I mean, you look around at all these people you love, because KK's whole family are my friends, and they were all crying and grieving for this beloved grandmother, and it was heartbreaking to see them so upset. Plus, with Gary (our pastor) officiating, I'm not sure why I had an inkling that I wouldn't cry, because he's so sensitive and eloquent and powerful every single time he speaks that it's awe-inspiring. At the end, we were all given flowers that we could either keep, or place on the casket to enter the grave with KK's grandma, and I decided to put mine on the casket. Then I hugged three of KK's brothers and KK herself, and every time I cried a little more because they were all crying and they all thanked me for coming which meant a lot that they were glad I had come. By the time I was all cried out, it was time to go. We headed back to our church where there was a meal waiting, which was delicious, but obviously kind of bittersweet since it came right after a funeral.

COLTON DIXON!!!!

     Then directly after the meal, we headed to Uprise Festival. KK came, which I think was really good for her because she needed something to take her mind off of all the sadness. Uprise was amazing as always, and emotional in the complete opposite direction. When you see so many thousands of people all gathered in one place praising the name of Jesus and singing for him and fellow-shipping with other believers, there is nothing like it in the world and it is absolutely moving. It made me so happy. The entire festival, I had a feeling of intense joy and happiness in my heart. Uprise always reaffirms my faith, because it makes me realize that there's no way so many people would be praising a man who is "just a teacher" or "just a historical figure". He is the Living Word of God, and to be surrounded by thousands of other people who also have a personal relationship with Christ, and love Him as much as I do is incomparable. It makes every day life seem a little dull. It also makes me want to liven up those dull days by carrying that joy and excitement for Jesus with me for the rest of the year. So right now, I'm pretty much on fire and nothing can stop me, but I know that eventually, I'll fall back into a rut. Hopefully that's later rather than sooner because I'm pretty nearly perfectly happy right now.

 

-VaughnDL