Yes I Gave Up The Internet For A Month And Survived

I wasn't planning on posting today because I have so much homework and organizing to do but I thought what the heck I'm already on the internet so I might as well post. Month 3 is over, I didn't know if I would survive or not. This month has made me feel a whirlwind of emotions from happy to extremely sad, angry etc. I thought that if I gave up my internet I would be happy and feel closer to God. Turns out that wasn't the case. My life is just as crazy with or without the internet. There is still work to do. I am constantly doing something and while I doing that certain thing I think about what I am going to do after that and how I am going to get it done. It is physically and mentally draining and taking the internet out of my schedule to reduce my stress and in fact this has been one of the most stressful months of my life. I never took the time to sit down and have a conversation with God. I thought that God would be angry with me and to be honest that made me angry because I simply didn't have the time.

I didn't have time.

At least that was what I was telling myself. I am sure that there were some times in September that I could have taken the bible and read some scripture for five minutes. The painting I put in this post is by one of my favorite artists Eric Samuel Timm. I remember watching him paint it at a youth conference and I don't think that there was one person in the room that wasn't crying. To me it's God reminding me that he is the one holding me up and not the other way around. God could do just fine without me but yet he chooses me and everyone else on this earth. I imagine him trying to tell me

"AB, I don't need you. I want you. You don't have to put on a show for me."

I forget that so easily to many times.

DFTBA
-AB