Guest Bloggers: FZ
Fiona and I were talking one time about having 'guest bloggers' on the blog. Someone who would write a random post for this random blog. It sounded like a really good idea so I asked her if she wanted to write something. I love what she wrote and I'm excited to share it with you.
Hello everyone!!! Buckle up and prepare yourself for one whirlwind of a blog post. Ever since I’ve started reading this FANTASTIC blog (many thanks to AB for letting me write this) I’ve contemplated what I would write about. I’ve looked for memorable quotes of the day, and tried to get inside the heads of SW, DL, and AB. I wish I was as eloquent as SW (she somehow perfectly describes exactly what I’m feeling), as witty as DV (no one makes me laugh as much as that girl), or as honest as AB (seriously, her vulnerability is amazing and INSPIRING). But you all will just have to make do with me today. I apologize in advance for the length, I have much too many thoughts (and way too much time).
Hmm what to blog about, what to blog about. Ahhh, the thing we’ve all discussed ad nauseam, the one thing we’re all 75% terrified about and 25% excited for (on a good day). Ok more like 90%/10% but just roll with me. I’ve done quite a bit of soul searching today while trying to decide what to write about, and was inspired by none other than Mr. Whitt.
I found myself (once again) visiting teachers and walking through the halls of Smithsburg this morning (I really need to find better things to do with my summer). SR, BL, and myself visited Mr. Whitt today, as he had disappeared and was nowhere to be found on our last visit (as Mr. Whitt is so prone to do. That man’s antisocial tendencies are to be admired). I was once again asked what school I would be attending, what my intended major was, when I would leave for school (you all know that struggle). Mr. Whitt, however, was unsatisfied with my responses (although he actually knew about Elon so yay! I swear it's a first). “Well what about engineering?” (Inside I chortled, what a thought). “Well don’t you want to make money?” “College is just paying your dues, whoever employs you will train you to do what they want, you just have to get through those four years of engineering.” Now this blog post is not meant to be depressing and emotional (although talk of college seems to inevitably be those two things), but I must admit I felt about two inches tall while leaving the school. There’s nothing like having your life ambitions and plans questioned. For the rest of the day I’ve had the slightly sick-lead brick in my stomach sensation that is usually reserved for AP tests. I began questioning my, admittedly, very sketchy-lots of holes-not really sure what’s really gonna happen-life plan. I tried to envision myself as an engineer or lawyer or some other socially acceptable/successful career, and immediately shot those ideas down. Because at the heart of it all I am desperately afraid of not being capable, of failing, of “not being enough.” There’s a certain safety in having uncertain life plans. You commit nothing, and consequently have nothing to lose if your plans fall through. Your hopes and dreams and self worth aren’t pinned on one major or career. In terms of making friends, I’m afraid that all of my weirdness and Fiona-ness will inevitably drive away all the semi-sane individuals at Elon (in all of North Carolina actually) and I’ll be stuck with the Kinayas of the world (another story for another day). And I think that’s something we’re all afraid of, that we’ll leave this amazing community of friends that loves and accepts us with all our quirks and idiosyncrasies and be essentially cut adrift. Or that the identity we’ve carved out for ourselves back home, this idea of the person we want to become, this whole future life we’ve envisioned for ourselves, is just wrong, we’re chasing an impossible dream.. At least these are the thoughts that have been running (well more like strolling, what is exercise) through my head. I don’t know if any of you have similar fears when it comes to college, but just know that you all are the most talented and interesting group of people I’ve ever met. My rather cliche response is to do whatever you’re passionate about and “not let anyone stand in your way.” By anyone, I’m talking about you, yes YOU, whoever’s reading this post. I’ve never been told I couldn’t do something, or wasn’t good enough. Rather, it's been the voice of fears and doubts that’s held me back. It’s the fear of what people would say and think, the crushing idea that I might give my best and it might not be enough. Well WHO FLIPPING CARES. Ok, you fall down. You pick yourself up again (or more accurately have all the many people that love you lift you up). Don’t let those little voices hold you back from pursuing what you are PASSIONATE about, what YOU love. Don’t let those insecurities stop you from being 100% authentic and completely true to YOU. Screw the people that don’t appreciate all of your weirdness and insanity. My one wish to you all is that you know how incredible I think each and everyone of you are :) I could’ve written an entire post about all of the amazing things about each of you (and was seriously contemplating it but I don’t have enough time or words). So, just know, you are ENOUGH. You are LOVED. And you are INCREDIBLE. Put yourself out there, and be VULNERABLE. You have to risk something to experience anything worthwhile. Now go to college and be your wonderful, perfectly imperfect self. Much love to you all. XOXO
Hello everyone!!! Buckle up and prepare yourself for one whirlwind of a blog post. Ever since I’ve started reading this FANTASTIC blog (many thanks to AB for letting me write this) I’ve contemplated what I would write about. I’ve looked for memorable quotes of the day, and tried to get inside the heads of SW, DL, and AB. I wish I was as eloquent as SW (she somehow perfectly describes exactly what I’m feeling), as witty as DV (no one makes me laugh as much as that girl), or as honest as AB (seriously, her vulnerability is amazing and INSPIRING). But you all will just have to make do with me today. I apologize in advance for the length, I have much too many thoughts (and way too much time).
Hmm what to blog about, what to blog about. Ahhh, the thing we’ve all discussed ad nauseam, the one thing we’re all 75% terrified about and 25% excited for (on a good day). Ok more like 90%/10% but just roll with me. I’ve done quite a bit of soul searching today while trying to decide what to write about, and was inspired by none other than Mr. Whitt.
I found myself (once again) visiting teachers and walking through the halls of Smithsburg this morning (I really need to find better things to do with my summer). SR, BL, and myself visited Mr. Whitt today, as he had disappeared and was nowhere to be found on our last visit (as Mr. Whitt is so prone to do. That man’s antisocial tendencies are to be admired). I was once again asked what school I would be attending, what my intended major was, when I would leave for school (you all know that struggle). Mr. Whitt, however, was unsatisfied with my responses (although he actually knew about Elon so yay! I swear it's a first). “Well what about engineering?” (Inside I chortled, what a thought). “Well don’t you want to make money?” “College is just paying your dues, whoever employs you will train you to do what they want, you just have to get through those four years of engineering.” Now this blog post is not meant to be depressing and emotional (although talk of college seems to inevitably be those two things), but I must admit I felt about two inches tall while leaving the school. There’s nothing like having your life ambitions and plans questioned. For the rest of the day I’ve had the slightly sick-lead brick in my stomach sensation that is usually reserved for AP tests. I began questioning my, admittedly, very sketchy-lots of holes-not really sure what’s really gonna happen-life plan. I tried to envision myself as an engineer or lawyer or some other socially acceptable/successful career, and immediately shot those ideas down. Because at the heart of it all I am desperately afraid of not being capable, of failing, of “not being enough.” There’s a certain safety in having uncertain life plans. You commit nothing, and consequently have nothing to lose if your plans fall through. Your hopes and dreams and self worth aren’t pinned on one major or career. In terms of making friends, I’m afraid that all of my weirdness and Fiona-ness will inevitably drive away all the semi-sane individuals at Elon (in all of North Carolina actually) and I’ll be stuck with the Kinayas of the world (another story for another day). And I think that’s something we’re all afraid of, that we’ll leave this amazing community of friends that loves and accepts us with all our quirks and idiosyncrasies and be essentially cut adrift. Or that the identity we’ve carved out for ourselves back home, this idea of the person we want to become, this whole future life we’ve envisioned for ourselves, is just wrong, we’re chasing an impossible dream.. At least these are the thoughts that have been running (well more like strolling, what is exercise) through my head. I don’t know if any of you have similar fears when it comes to college, but just know that you all are the most talented and interesting group of people I’ve ever met. My rather cliche response is to do whatever you’re passionate about and “not let anyone stand in your way.” By anyone, I’m talking about you, yes YOU, whoever’s reading this post. I’ve never been told I couldn’t do something, or wasn’t good enough. Rather, it's been the voice of fears and doubts that’s held me back. It’s the fear of what people would say and think, the crushing idea that I might give my best and it might not be enough. Well WHO FLIPPING CARES. Ok, you fall down. You pick yourself up again (or more accurately have all the many people that love you lift you up). Don’t let those little voices hold you back from pursuing what you are PASSIONATE about, what YOU love. Don’t let those insecurities stop you from being 100% authentic and completely true to YOU. Screw the people that don’t appreciate all of your weirdness and insanity. My one wish to you all is that you know how incredible I think each and everyone of you are :) I could’ve written an entire post about all of the amazing things about each of you (and was seriously contemplating it but I don’t have enough time or words). So, just know, you are ENOUGH. You are LOVED. And you are INCREDIBLE. Put yourself out there, and be VULNERABLE. You have to risk something to experience anything worthwhile. Now go to college and be your wonderful, perfectly imperfect self. Much love to you all. XOXO
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