A La LA La

Halloa.

     So this morning I realized as we were driving down the driveway on our way to church that I had forgotten to put my contacts in or my glasses on. I had intended to wear my glasses, but had just forgotten, and since my vision isn't too absurdly awful, I didn't realize until I looked out the car window. At first I was like, "Oh crap! I forgot to put my glasses or contacts on!" and my mom was like, "Do you want to go grab your glasses?" but then I was like, "Eh, no." So I just went to church visually impaired and it was kind of interesting. I could only see clearly for like, two pews in front of me, and everything else was blurry. Anyway, the reason why I'm telling you this long, boring story, is because I've had this thought for a while, and it's that people see you not in crystal clear, minute detail, but in a hazy blurred image. If I ever try to recall what someone was wearing after I talked to them for the first time, I usually can't remember. What I do remember, though, is whether they were happy. I remember what we talked about, and if they were nice. (Bear with me if I've blogged about this exact topic before, because it really feels like I have.) Their personality had a much bigger impact on me than their appearance did.  And as school approaches, I guess I need to try to remember that. I have no choice but to wear my Link Leader t-shirt on the first day of school, so I won't be planning out a fantabulous "first day of school outfit", but that's okay. Most people are too worried about how THEY look on the first day of school to care about what YOU look like. I mean, honestly, how often have you been more worried about how someone else looked than how you looked? I can honestly say never. Maybe once or twice, if I think really long and hard. (Actually, back in kindergarten I would come home and tell my mom what my teacher wore that day, so I think I cared more about how she looked than how I did, but I was five years old and in love with her.)

     It's natural to be self-centered. After all, who do you spend every moment of your life with? YOU. You know you more than anyone else. You are in your head every second of every day, talking to yourself and arguing with yourself and being embarrassed by yourself. The only way you've ever seen the world is through YOUR eyes, through YOUR body. It's natural to make everyone and everything around you blurry and have only you and the things closest to you in focus. It's hard to have everything crystal clear and center-stage. Some things get pushed into the peripheral.  But we have to remember that just because we are the star of our own Me show, we're not the star of everyone else's. They don't notice that pimple on your cheek, or the shoes you've had since sixth grade, or the fatness of you face, or the fact that your front teeth don't line up in the middle of your face. You notice those things because you're the main character of your Me show. Which is fine. We all are. But that doesn't mean we have to look amazing all the time. It means quite the opposite. Don't worry about what you look like on the first day of school. Most people won't notice. But they will notice if you say "hi" to them in the hallway, or ask how their summer was, or help them find their classroom. People don't notice your shoes; they notice whether you were kind to them. And, okay, so sometimes they do notice your shoes. But let You matter more than your shoes. 

     This is such a cheesy post, oh my gosh, I don't even know what I'm saying. Like, I had an inkling when I started, and then I was like, "SE, what the crap are you talking about?" and she was like, "I don't know! Just go with it. It sounds all like, inspiring and crap, and the whole 'everyone is visually impaired' thing is good, just like roll with it." and I was like, "I lost that train of thought back in like, Timbuktu. I don't even know how to connect my little anecdote with this life lesson anymore." and she was like, "But you've already written like, a whole paragraph, so keep going." and I'm like, "Yeah, nobody will notice, it sounds like I know what I'm talking about." and she was like, "Yeah, there you go... yeah, yeah, "blurry", "focus", ooh, yeah, "peripheral", that's a good word." And I'm rolling my eyes and thinking how I'm just sitting on my high horse, using the infamous, imperial "You" and just preachin', preachin', preachin', even though I got no clue what I'm sayin', sayin', sayin'.

Day 268 Song Recommendation: "She's So Strange" by Travis.
-SE Wagner